The Over Tired Mind…

…and anxiety.

It’s a tough combination. You’re tired mentally and physically. You lay down and are excited to rest. That when the anxiety picks a topic and then kicks you into emotional turmoil, even in your exhaustion. Scenarios run through your mind until you’ve come up with every bad outcome. All you want it sleep. It’s about work. Usually is. About all the ways I fail. It would be so nice to have some positive attributes of myself mixed in for momentary relief. But that’s now how it works is it? Those thoughts telling you how bad you suck become the only thing ringing in your brain. Then you start counting the hours of how long you can sleep. The hours start slipping through your fingers, another casualty of anxiety. You know you’ll wake up just as exhausted (after you finally fall asleep). But you’ll slap on a smile (after lots of caffeine) and pretend it’s all okay. Put on that mask for another day so no one else knows how you spent another sleepless night worrying. Another night taken by anxiety. But you’ll hide it and make it through another day and wait for the next round with anxiety. You know it’s coming. You just hope it takes its time and gives you some rest. Some rest would be so nice and is needed.

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