Am I Really Cut Out For…

…casual sex?

Warning: If you are related to me you may wanna skip this entry. My FWB and I have picked a day to meetup. We have talked about boundaries, what we like, what we don’t and laid out good ground rules. We seem fairly physically compatible (he likes to be the dominate aggressor and is adventurous – yes please. He’s incredibly honest which is what had me suggesting this FWB situation in the first place). It’s actually a really healthy arrangement…on paper. My head is going a little wacky though. My ex has made it crystal clear he has moved on from me in every sense of the phrase, but somehow it feels like a betrayal to him. I know it makes zero sense. It is clearly 100% over – I have every right to casual sex with an attractive man. Frankly, it’s exciting. But why is my anxiety running it’s ass wild in my head? Maybe I am afraid he wont think I am attractive? He clearly thinks I am – we have met in person and he wants to have sex with me so logic says that’s not it. Am I afraid I will get hurt? Maybe. I don’t want to catch the feels. But I am fresh out of feels so not an issue for now. I was on the fence until my neighbor (who I share a wall with) was having really loud sex last night and seemed to be really enjoying it and it totally turned me on. Couldn’t help it. So maybe a sex pallet cleanser is exactly what I need. A partner to explore without risk of emotional pain, but maintain a mutual respect.

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