I know the general thought is that you are enough being you. I do think that’s true but some days it just doesn’t feel that way. Today is one of the those days. There is no particular reason or cause I just don’t feel like I am enough in a lot of ways at the moment.
I definitely feel like I am not enough at work. I do my best and it’s all I can do but somehow it feels like it’s coming up short of other peoples expectations. That is a really shit feelings. Especially when those around me seem to be exceeding them on a regular basis. This brings me back to the comparing yourself to others isn’t a great idea when attempting to set your own p(e)ace.
I feel like I am not enough in my personal relationships either. I put effort in but is it enough? Am I good girlfriend? Am I good friend? Am I good sister? daughter? aunt? person? Today I am just worried about falling short of the mark. The kind of worry that rolls around in your brain like clothes in a dryer.
How do I set my own p(e)ace and be enough for all the aspects and people in my life? How do I give all those things and special people all I can and still have some left for myself? I am just not sure I know. I feel like I do really well concentrating on one section but then the others suffer.I set boundaries between work and life so I can have a life but then I feel like I am not doing enough. And the dryer of thoughts continue…
Maybe this is stemming from my ankle being messed up still and not being able to workout, specifically going to RIPPED. It always helps keep me sane and without it I feel a bit lost and a bit less attractive. I love getting a good sweat in and being the woman who legitimately uses her gym clothes (although I love just sitting around in them to hahaha).
I don’t particularly care for these days. It feels like I am voluntarily torturing myself but somehow can’t stop the dryer thoughts from going round and round either. My brother was always excellent at snapping me from this type of mood; but I am working on learning to do it myself. That is why I am sharing it with you. Maybe we can help each other and remind each other to be proud of the effort we put in and know it’s enough.
Does anyone else have these days?