One Challenge At a Time…

…to put your damn mask on in day.

My Sundays have become a mix of both my jobs and a long ass day. I woke up at 3:45 am to be in Escondido at 5:45 am to race to my other job in Dana Point as quickly as possible to be done working around 3:30 pm. I decided instead of looking at the day as a whole I just had to take it one challenge at a time, starting with getting up lol. It’s a challenge at that time. I took on my day like this and it went well. Just complete the task in front of you rather then the whole day at once. At my second job and I noticed people really dropping the ball on wearing masks. I had to ask folks to put on their mask or remind them how to wear it properly. I started to feel like I was doing more of that then actually teaching. It was met with annoyance and arguments – ‘I am vaccinated’ well I am not and a lot of people still aren’t (I get my second shot on Thursday), ‘No one else was in here’ – um ok but see all the stuff you’re breathing on that a bunch of other people touch? yeah you gotta wear that mask, ‘but we are outside’ – well you are on a campus with other people so put the mask on. This lax type of attitude, using being vaccinated as an excuse to do anything without thought to others who are still vulnerable, and thinking this pandemic is over is what will set us back. Do you want to quarantine again? I don’t. Put the damn mask on! Also, if it isn’t covering your nose, it isn’t effective. Do you use condoms with holes in them too? Cause that doesn’t work either. Put the mask on and wear it right – you know what proper mask wearing is by now. We all do. Home stretch y’all – let’s do it!

A Physical Challenge…

…and a reality check!

This weekend was Tallships Festival which is an incredibly physical event. I walked over 20,000 steps per day always go go go. This event provided me with a reality check on my current physical health and weight. I know I have put on weight in the last year, I am not blind – but man by the end of those festival days I was dead on my feet. I felt pain in the bottom of my feet and my knees and that is due to the extra weight.

Please don’t get me wrong – I love and appreciate my body at pretty much any weight. I carry a little extra weight well in the looks department. My body has gotten me around for 33 years and given me all I need to live my life. Extra weight will never make me hate it or pick at it. The regular sex is proof I am still damn cute and feel cute. This isn’t about being skinny and conforming to that. This is about health and living up to my potential physically.

So it’s time do something for my physical health and how I feel. It’s time to eat a little better (I am not on board with drastic, crazy diets I can’t maintain), and getting more physical. This is where my Halloween 5K challenge to myself comes in! I HATE RUNNING! Seriously hate it – but I am going to prove I can do it. When I meet this challenge I will be in a better place physically. Today is day one of training. I will keep you posted on the progress.

I will never give up my chips, but it’s time to ration them for awhile 😉

Charlotte’s Experience Setting Her Own P(e)ace While…

…building a successful career, dating, finding her Harry, and learning to live without apologies.

After breaking up Mr. X, I quietly starting hanging out with another guy and kept  it very much on the down low as I wanted to protect it from all the judgement from family and friends. I was not ready to answer all of the questions and defend myself as to how could I be ready to date again after ending a 3 plus year relationship. Again, I did it my own way on my own timeline. It took a few months and then I decided to tell my friends and family I was dating a new guy.

There will always be pressure from society, friends and family members asking you at each step of your life more and more questions but my best advice to you is to stay your ground, and make your own way. Don’t be a sheep and follow the masses, stand out and be yourself.

About 6 months into this new relationship, my new boyfriend and I had a talk about expectations and wants and where we saw ourselves in 5 years. Heavy questions at 6 months yes, but we were both almost into our 30s so I felt these questions were warranted. I followed my instinct and knew I could not emotionally invest anymore time into this relationship if I didn’t put it out there what I wanted in life. I told my new boyfriend that I would give this relationship 2 years at most and if before that or at that time we both don’t see this going anywhere then we can walk away. He was startled and shocked that I could put a timeline on a relationship and expected him to accept that. I told him I know for ME that I will know by 2 years if I see a long term future with the person I am dating. I was NOT shy and told him that I dated people and I KNEW what I wanted in a partner.  We had our up and downs during this relationship but one thing that was for not misunderstood was MY timeline and my feelings because I did what I thought was right and put it on the line.

Fast forwarding two years, we were engaged to be married. My boyfriend has proposed on our two year dating anniversary and took me by surprise! No mention of anything at all until one evening when we were walking to dinner after a play and I look over and he was down on one knee! AHH! I said YES! Here I was over the moon happy and couldn’t believe it!

Even though I was on cloud 9 with excitement there were still some friends and family in my life saying the engagement wasn’t fast enough and you already lost two years and that I should get married ASAP if I wanted kids. Again, people love to share their opinions regardless of the occasion or event in your life.

My advice is to always be true to yourself and take a pause and enjoy moments of joy with your significant other and let your friends and family wait. We told our closest family and friends about our engagement the day but the rest could wait.

Dating and having a career is challenging but it can be done. Don’t be shy to cancel dates because of a project at work, or pushing dinner plans because you are trying to meet a deadline. If the person you are dating is truly supportive of your career they will understand. I hated rescheduling dates but I often did because of work. I didn’t think it was fair to the person I was dating to have to put up with me when I was fried from a bad day at work or let alone in a horrible mood that no amount of cosmos or food could fix. Sometimes we all need a personal mental health day to go home get chick-fil-a and watch a romantic comedy on Netflix and that is OKAY. I always felt it was better to reschedule vs go ahead with the date and end up in an argument or something because I was NOT at my best to start with.

Sometimes it’s hard to not talk about work when you are on dates but one rule I made was I allowed the first ten minutes of the date to be where we can talk about our days at work but after that no more work talk. I felt like this allowed me to truly “leave work at work” and be the true me and relax, unwind, and get to know the person across from me.